4Cross Love Letter #26 Love Rhythms
Dear 4Cross Love Birds,
The Rhythm of Love: Understanding Love Cycles Through 4Cross Positions
Dear 4Cross Love Birds,
Love isn’t static—it moves through natural cycles of excitement, stability, challenge, and renewal. Just like the changing seasons, relationships ebb and flow, shifting between moments of passion, calm, tension, and transformation.
But here’s the secret: Each 4Cross position experiences and navigates these cycles differently. Understanding how your biological love position interacts with the rhythm of relationships allows you to embrace each phase without fear, doubt, or resistance.
When you trust the cycle of love, you move with it—not against it.
Phase 1: The Spark (Excitement & Initiation)
💖 The Thrill of New Beginnings & Emotional Awakening
This is the stage of new attraction, discovery, and inspiration. Everything feels fresh, exciting, and limitless.
How Each Position Experiences the Spark:
🔹 Norths (Initiators & Leaders) – Take charge, set the relationship’s foundation, and create a vision for the future.
🔹 Easts (Explorers & Free Spirits) – Embrace the thrill of spontaneity, adventure, and passion.
🔹 Souths (Nurturers & Deep Feelers) – Seek emotional depth, connection, and meaning in the excitement.
🔹 Wests (Planners & Stabilizers) – Feel cautious but intrigued, slowly analyzing if the connection is worth investing in.
How to Navigate This Phase:
✅ North: Lead, but don’t control—allow space for organic connection.
✅ East: Enjoy the passion, but don’t chase only novelty—commit to depth.
✅ South: Stay present in the excitement—don’t rush emotional attachment.
✅ West: Allow yourself to feel rather than overanalyze—love isn’t a checklist.
Love thrives when excitement is met with patience.
Phase 2: Stability (Comfort & Routine)
The Deepening of Love & Trust
After the initial thrill, love moves into a phase of stability, comfort, and deeper understanding. This is where trust is built, routines form, and the relationship finds its rhythm.
How Each Position Responds to Stability:
🔹 Norths (Leaders & Visionaries) – Start focusing on building a future together, setting long-term goals.
🔹 Easts (Explorers & Energy Bringers) – May fear monotony and need new experiences to keep things exciting.
🔹 Souths (Nurturers & Harmony Seekers) – Feel most at home in this phase, creating emotional security and closeness.
🔹 Wests (Planners & Realists) – Feel relieved that the relationship has a predictable, structured foundation.
How to Navigate This Phase:
✅ North: Remember, stability doesn’t mean stagnation—keep nurturing emotional connection.
✅ East: Find ways to bring newness into the routine without resisting security.
✅ South: Ensure your needs are being met, not just the needs of your partner.
✅ West: Be open to a little spontaneity—love isn’t just about predictability.
💡 Love deepens when comfort is met with curiosity.
Phase 3: Challenge (Conflict & Growth)
💖 Facing Friction & Overcoming Relationship Tests
Every relationship hits obstacles—miscommunication, disagreements, or personal struggles. This is not a sign of failure, but a natural phase that tests commitment, patience, and personal growth.
How Each Position Reacts to Conflict:
🔹 Norths (Leaders & Visionaries) – May become impatient, pushing for quick solutions rather than emotional resolution.
🔹 Easts (Explorers & Expressers) – Can react impulsively, feeling trapped by relational tension.
🔹 Souths (Nurturers & Harmonizers) – May avoid conflict, prioritizing peace over real resolution.
🔹 Wests (Planners & Realists) – Can withdraw emotionally, overanalyzing instead of expressing feelings.
How to Navigate This Phase:
✅ North: Learn to listen instead of trying to fix everything immediately.
✅ East: Don’t run from discomfort—growth happens through emotional depth.
✅ South: Speak up when you’re hurt—avoiding conflict doesn’t create harmony.
✅ West: Trust emotions as much as logic—relationships aren’t just problems to solve.
Love strengthens when challenges are met with understanding.
Phase 4: Renewal (Rediscovery & Evolution)
💖 Reigniting Passion & Recommitting to Love
This phase marks a fresh start—whether it’s a deepened level of love, a renewed sense of passion, or a commitment to new growth. This phase breathes life back into the relationship, making love feel new again.
How Each Position Experiences Renewal:
🔹 Norths (Leaders & Visionaries) – Set new relationship goals, creating a vision for future growth.
🔹 Easts (Explorers & Free Spirits) – Seek new experiences together, breaking old routines.
🔹 Souths (Nurturers & Deep Feelers) – Focus on emotional reconnection & deepening intimacy.
🔹 Wests (Planners & Realists) – Strengthen trust & security, reinforcing long-term commitment.
How to Navigate This Phase:
✅ North: Don’t just focus on goals—reconnect emotionally.
✅ East: Find excitement within the relationship, not just outside of it.
✅ South: Let go of past hurt—forgiveness is part of renewal.
✅ West: Allow room for change—relationships evolve, and that’s okay.
Love flourishes when renewal is met with gratitude.
Final Thoughts: Trusting the Flow of Love
No relationship stays in one phase forever—love moves in cycles, just like nature.
💖 Norths initiate.
💖 Easts energize.
💖 Souths stabilize.
💖 Wests refine.
By understanding your natural love rhythm, you can move through each phase with confidence, patience, and awareness. Instead of fearing change, embrace it as part of the journey—because the best love stories aren’t linear, they are ever-evolving.
🌿 Love flows when you stop fighting the current. 🌿
Until we meet again,
Shelly LaVigne - Love Investigator
